Category: Uncategorized

The world is a wedding

September 25, 2017

For Helena and Thomas… Sitting near the back inside the hall where one hundred people gathered to celebrate a union, these five words circled in my head, the title to a Delmore Schwartz short story, late Brooklyn writer, perhaps his best one. It is difficult to recall now, having read the story about a year […]

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Process

May 18, 2017

Los Angeles — I’ve been awake since 5 am local time, wired to rise on eastern time yet dragged down by the lag. This reorientation of time loosens thoughts, and they shake about in my blacked-out hotel room, curtains and blinds drawn to block the rising sun, while I think about all the tasks I need to […]

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Seek the joy in your work

April 23, 2017

Since July of last year, I’ve lost approximately eighty pounds, and counting. I don’t say this to brag; that I mention it at all now suggests, I hope, a purer intent, something more worthwhile and less self-serving than narcissism. Iterative transformation over time obscures my ability to see the details, to note the smallest changes, […]

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We are not yet dead

April 19, 2017

Dear reader, Hope transcends despair in an anxious world, the expected fulfillment of the undefined and idealistic future, a human yearning, describes for us the approach to the daily task. Hope offers definition and a purpose to the nebulous everyday, as our memories grant recognizable bodies to ghosts. We remember the dead as they lived. I […]

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A convoluted and wonderful play

March 8, 2017

In Legion, the new FX television series based on the Marvel comic character of the same name, an extraordinarily powerful and telepathic mutant, David, is unsure of his surroundings, of the time and place in which he exists, and regards his ability to discern between the real and the imaginative as dubious, baffled by his […]

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A future inclusive society

November 13, 2016

I awoke on November 9, 2016 after a fitful sleep. This should be of no surprise to anyone; after all, for the past eighteen months I had been told that a Trump presidential electoral victory would signify the apocalypse. For my part, as a matter of self-preservation, I turned to my partner, who turned to me, […]

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One of Two

October 26, 2016

What does a man think about when he is twenty-four hours away from seeing his partner whom he hasn’t seen in ten days? Well— I’ve been catatonic the entire time— not the right word, but it sounds right; it makes me think of catacombs, of comas, of supersonic flight between two points, and that’s all […]

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Crying in public

September 9, 2016

Often, I see people crying on the subway, either in the train or on the platform. I always try to make eye contact, though I am rarely successful. They don’t so much look away as they are always looking down, or nowhere, out into space, running the film in their heads over and again. I […]

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Self care

September 5, 2016

The exam room’s white ceiling offered up a future in disconnected constellations; the ceiling’s many dots connect and form nothing, and the adhesive is cold to the touch. I wince each time the nurse applies an electrode to my body—one each for my legs and arms, and four along the left side of my torso—because […]

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Taking Pictures

September 2, 2016

I like to populate my Instagram feed with photos framed by ennui, the blue filters chosen for effect. With equal parts vanity and boredom, I inundate viewers with quiet, compressed photos. Since reading Sontag’s On Photography, I’ve tried to give the medium a fair shake, an attempt elucidated by time and distance, away from Georgia […]

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